There is a certain feeling that comes over me every summer. First, I must tell you, I love warm weather. Each year it is getting more and more difficult to deal with the winter months. There is nothing charming about snow to me any more, heavy coat, big boots and the general blah that comes with freezing nipples..you know what I mean. Nevertheless, the summer holds its on challenges for me that are also not so pleasant. As an actor it tends to be one of the slowest periods for me financially, it feels a little bit like a teacher without the security of...well .. a steady paycheck.
My birthday is in November so it's a reminder I am one year closer to be sexually irrelevant which is always a cheery thought and as a season it just flies by. We are now in August and it feels like I closed my eyes and now my favorite fruit ..cherry season is nearly over. These are not the problems that cause one to stop all living but its enough to keep me in a space that is not always the most productive. The challenge of growing older in an industry that punishes you for every bit of gravity that becomes apparent is hard no matter how vain people might think that is. It's like racing against a clock that is chuckling with every move you make because its an futile cause. That paired with limited income makes for a funky mood..and not in the positive James Brown way. Again, there is no resolve here, no incredible words of wisdom to make it all okay. Just an acknowledgement that life continues and whether you are in the throes of joy or in the pit of despair the wheel continues. So take that teary tissue, those thighs you have love/hate/ anguish then maybe some like for, get some awesome fro yo and enjoy what you can. We have to remember that emotions are not reality and what we feel can not dictate all that we do. You can feel sad , still get on the at roller coaster, go to that free concert or just take that walk on the beach.
Thanks for stopping by!!
An Actor/Director sharing her thoughts on creativity in this crazy metropolis, New Yawk Citay.