New Year...New Heart

I was fortunate enough to travel to Los Angeles this fall. It was only 9 days but it was great. I did so much I felt I needed a vacation from the vacation. I spent time with friends I love and have known over 7 years and some as long as 20. I saw the beaches, gazed at the Hollywood sign and fell in love with my friend's dog Leo.  The whole vacation was the movement and grace of G*d and I am very thankful. I now believe G*d's purpose to be there was to open myself to receiving. Now, I know how new agey this sounds and when I heard a Nichiren Buddhist once say he chanted to be able to receive love, I was like...huh??? Now a couple of years later and a few less hairs, I understand. I was shown alot kindness while I in California.  Fortunately, I  have been blessed to have been shown  a lot in my life but after speaking to people when I arrived back specifically my sister and my friend Marlena,  I realized while I was polite and even thankful I didn't fully accept.  To be able to receive doesn't necessarily mean your gruff or your not grateful. You can be polite and gracious but if you are uncomfortable, you rebuff someone's compliment or you can't really just accept with out trying to give back then you aren't receiving. I am so accustomed to returning the compliment, or trying for some way to put us on equal ground, I am not allowing the other person to just give and receive my appreciation. Thats why my number 1 resolution is to be able to receive, because  I realized it doesn't matter what blessings come into my life, if I don't feel worthy or comfortable I will sabotage them, which has happened on occasion. I wish I had learned this lesson earlier, I would have saved myself alot of disappointments and heartache but life is filled with woulda, coulda, shoulda. I hope this testimony can also benefit someone else who may be experiencing similar challenges, it seems like the most simple lesson in the world but that's enduring joke about living. Sometimes the most difficult circumstances can just as easily be changed by an accessible solution...sometimes!! Happy New Year and I wish us all a New Receiving Heart! #newyear2016 #prayer  #reflection #love #losangles #la #blackactresswinning #spirituality